How do I kiss a pig?

Hint 1 of 5:

Are you really that hard up for a date?

Hint 2 of 5:

Well, the pig isn't. It doesn't kiss anything it doesn't love.

Hint 3 of 5:

Of course, modern Torus medicine is wonder for such things.

Hint 4 of 5:

Have you examined the medicine cabinet in the barn?