Vampires 
By Benedict Walmisley

"This is Steve Mahoney of ABC News broadcasting from Glasgow in the United Kingdom, at about 4am this morning the south of England was the ground zero for a large Neutron Bomb explosion. This appears to have been the British Goverments overstated reaction to a sudden plaque which hit the south of England a week ago.  

"Reports at this time are sketchy, but it seems that an aid worker in Romania contracted some form of disease at the orphanage she was working at. As she felt ill, she returned to  England where her friends recommended that she see a doctor.  

"The doctors were mystified by the pallor of her skin and the presence of a then unidentified bacterium in her blood. They also noted that she could no longer digest anything apart from blood and high concentration saline and glucose solutions.  

"At this time, some reporters in Romania heard of this and tried to gain access to the  orphanage where she worked. They could not get in due to the doors being locked. As they noticed an extremely overpowering odour of rotting flesh they decided to break the  doors down. 
 
"When they entered the orphanage, they found that the whole place was full of dead children and aid workers - most had had their throats cut open with knives or teeth, but there was not as much blood around as expected - almost as though the blood had been collected.  

"By the time this news got to the British authorities they had another problem - the army had been called in to put down an apparently sudden madness that was sweeping nighttime London. Grandmothers were attacking children, dogs were attacking men.  

"Eventually some medical researchers pointed out that all the people shot by the army had had blood transfusions in the past week. Further investigations revealed that some doctors in the St James Hospital in London had been drinking blood from the blood donor clinics. Whatever infection brought on this madness also was contageous through blood ingestion. 

"After one army barracks had to be destroyed it was discovered this infective madness could be contracted through relatively minor bites like rabies. When some soldiers contracted the disease, almost 300 soldiers died, through their mates killing them where they slept. 

"It was around now that the people within London started to panic, and those with guns defended their homes as best they could - soon the whole city was in turmoil - people shooting each other in blind panic. It was worse than when the bubonic plague swept across Delhi in '97.

"It was after this that a cordon was thrown around London - no one could get in or out, anyone trying to do so was shot on sight. As the pacifiers were themselves becoming infected it was gradually becoming clear to the goverment, now relocated to Edinburgh, that the plague was neither treatable nor containable. 

"At great risk one of the corpses was flown to the Porton Down bacteriology institute, where the bacterium was discovered to modify the hosts DNA and that the bacterium's ideal growth media was, in fact, blood. The bacterium was a close relative to the rabies bacterium, but unlike rabies replicated very rapidly and in the bloodstream of the patient as well as the nervous system.  

"It was only after the army found that people attempting to break the barracade would brave anything to get out - even light machine guns and explosive rounds - that the goverment finally decided to eliminate the plague before it eliminated the UK as a whole. Chemical weapons were ruled out, as were conventional Hydrogen bombs. The only resort was the use of the Neutron bomb, which the United states donated for the event.  

"However we cannot be sure that no one escaped from London, so the British Goverment would like all citizens to report any people that are seen behaving oddly, or people with unusual bite marks to report them IMMEDIATELY to their local euthanasia center... Anyone having been bitten by a dog or cat in the last 72 hours should also report there without delay.