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Text File  |  1990-01-01  |  5KB  |  121 lines
  1.                  " WOMEN "  A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS????
  2.                   ----------------------------------
  3.                           Written but not composed
  4.                                   by
  5.                                "The MASTER"
  6.                                 ...........
  7.                      Element:-    Women
  8.  
  9.                      Symbol:-      Wo
  10.  
  11.                    Discoverer:-   Adam
  12.  
  13.                   Atomic Mass:-  Accepted as 53.6 kg. but known to
  14.                                vary between 40 to 200 kg.
  15.  
  16.                 Occurences:-    Copious quantities in all urban areas.
  17.  
  18.                               PHYSICAL PROPERTIES.
  19.                              ......................
  20.                 1. Surface usually covered in a painted film.
  21.  
  22.                 2. Boils at nothing freezes with out reason.
  23.  
  24.                 3. Melts if given special treatment.
  25.  
  26.                 4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
  27.  
  28.                 5. Found in various states from virgin matrial to
  29.                              common ore.
  30.  
  31.                 6. Yields if pressure is applied in correct places.
  32.  
  33.                                  CHEMICAL PROPERTIES.
  34.                                 .....................
  35.                 1. Has great affinity for gold,silver,diamonds etc.
  36.  
  37.                 2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
  38.  
  39.                 3. May explode without prior warning or reason.
  40.  
  41.                 4.Insoluble in liquids,but activity is greatly
  42.                   increased by saturation in alcaholic solutions.
  43.  
  44.                 5. Most powerfull money reducing agent known to man.
  45.  
  46.                                   COMMON USES
  47.                                  .............
  48.                  1.Highly ornamental,especially in sports cars.
  49.                  2.Can be a great aid to relaxation.
  50.                  3.Very effective cleaning agent.
  51.  
  52.                                    TESTS
  53.                                  ........
  54.                     1.Pure specimen turns rosey pink when discovered
  55.                              in the natural state.
  56.  
  57.                     2.Turns green when put beside a better specimen.
  58.  
  59.                                     HAZARDS
  60.                                  .............
  61.                     1.Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
  62.  
  63.                     2.Illegal to possess more than one,although
  64.                       several can be maintained at different locations
  65.                      provided specimens do not come in direct contact
  66.                        with each other.
  67.                     ................................................
  68.  
  69.                  Please note:  If you find this analysis offensive or
  70.                                degrading to women then i think YOU are
  71.                                     SAD SAD individual.........
  72.  
  73.  
  74.                             Watch out for more from
  75.  
  76.                                   "The MASTER"
  77.                                        in
  78.  
  79.                                     "KELSTAR"
  80. ======================================================================
  81. ======================================================================
  82. ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
  83. ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
  84. ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
  85. 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
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  87. ££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££
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