You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thing in the middle of them. WORSE: You get the glasses home and cut the tag off only to realize the tag was holding them together. That's what you get for shopping at Wal-Mart.
The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle. WORSE: The person follows your exact route around the ENTIRE market, smashing your ankle in every single aisle, then somehow gets IN FRONT of you at the checkout, THEN he/she takes out their entire coupon file, and you are in line for 3 hours.
The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on. WORSE: Dummy, you forgot to press the button for your floor, so the elevator goes ALL the way back down, once again stopping at every floor to let no one on.
There's always a car riding your tail when you're slowing down to find an address. WORSE: That person behind you actually LIVES at the house you are looking for. Now you really look like an idiot.
You open a can of soup and the lid falls in. WORSE: You fish out the lid and find you have accidentally opened that can of corn chowder your Aunt brought over three years ago. Yeeuuch!
The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper never works for you. WORSE: While fighting with the Band-Aid wrapper, you get a paper cut on your other hand.
There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at everything. WORSE: The dog barks at everything EXCEPT the guy that broke into your house in broad daylight.
You can never put anything back in a box the way it came. WORSE: You're sneaking a peek at your Christmas presents and can't get them back in the box the way they came. Plus you ripped the wrapping paper, stupid.
Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth. WORSE: You also had mustard on your tie and your fly was down, and now you realize why everyone was passing notes under the table and snickering.
You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette. WORSE: You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette with their own urine.